Schizotypal Forum

I noticed that many of you seem to be in your 20's.
I am in my 40s, and although I havent been diagnosed with SPD, i feel it is what I have been living with all these years. I have learned stuff about interaction with people and stuff, making eye contact etc, all the good afternoon and how are you stuff, but sometimes it breaks down..I have a long period of feeling stablized, and then it all goes crazy, like ~last week, I went of the rails a bit, all my paranoias got the better of me..now I feel back 'online' again and was able to handle some situations in work today...never let them get out of hand..

Has anyone else had this kind of fluctuation; is there anybody else out there who has lived with this condition undetected for many years and 'learned' how to control it or could I just be kind of Bipolar or something?
I was thinking of going into therapy, but I am gonna try meditaion instead, I will give it a try...

I ended up in the mental hospital in seattle at 19 and was wrongly diagnosed three times, first as schizophrenic and then as Bipolar and finally as some form of invented bipolar disorder without depression (witch doesn't make sence, of course) They gave me antipsychotics like olanzapene and others, and finally saddled me with lithium witch always ended up in toxic levels and made me wander around like a zombie. After getting home my mom couldn't stand how zombie, catatonic and strange I was and so stopped the medication. I got better. I got back to my 'old self' witch I now recognize as Schizotypal. I haven't been on medication for five years, although I have had bouts of paranoid magical thinking that seemed scary at first to others then got less and less severe and it's been a long time since I've had an episode. I know this sounds naive but I think it is very possible to go through life schizotypal without medicating yourself. Holistic treatment helped as well, I mean eating lots of fish for the Omega-3 fatty acids, it might have just been placebo effect, but it seemed to help me. Of course I still get paranoid and of course I still entertain elaborate fantasies in my head, but I don't need medication. And I'll never take another drug for it. If it gets so bad that I need to be rehospitalized (witch I doubt because I'm sure I just have SPD and it wouldn't make sense for me to not be able to handle myself like I couldn't when I was first hospitalized) that would mean I have schizophrenia and there really is no hope for that. Haldol and delaying the enevitable. If you've spent all this time without drugs, I bet you can keep it up.

It was during my early twenties that I found it tough. When I reached thirty I began to develop an inner live fed largely by books, science, philosophy, history and more. I've become more rational and accepting of myself and can honestly say I wouldn't want to be 'normal'. Maybe people should love their condition. Better to be different than a sheep I say. Obviously I have never gone right off the edge and needed medication though in my twenties I would have accepted it if offered.

I dont now, sometimes there is a part of me that thinks that one day I am just going to go completely insane...I cant explain. It worries me. I have been rethinking the shrink thing, I think I will go and just talk to someone see what they think. I found this other forum for people with Cyclothymia, I can also seem to identify with some of that. I really dont know...
Have you been diagnosed with StPD then Y-Chromo kid?

No I haven't mysteryteacher, but it was obvious to me by early adulthood that I wasn't what you can call well adjusted. I diagnosed myself. At first I thought I was Schizoid but I'm far to emotional in my manner at times and they are supposedly flat outwardly. I share the schizoid taste for solitude and wouldn't worry if I never had to speak to another human being again. Humans in general make me feel anxious and bored.

I think it all depends on what you mean when you say 'treatment' - what immediately springs to mind is the traditional medical model approach of pills pills and more pills...which in my view is not absolutely necessary.... however ---- I do think that some kind of 'help' is needed for schizotyps who struggle to achieve a feeling stability and comfort.
For myself, I feel completely uncomfortable with psychiatry so I have looked outside and around it - experimenting with alternative methods like art therapy and mindfulness practice. Basically I don't think that I would be very stable without anything - I need some kind strategy for tackling my at times crazy and debilitating thinking! I think that I don't engage in constant mental maintenance I will go down down down bad. I go pretty nuts with the paranoia crap. I guess I would say its up to the person - maybe some people don't feel like they need as much help as I do to function - and then its all about the fit - gotta' find what works and feels comfortable

Not without some form of treatment, which is always positive and results in personal growth! I think self-therapy is first thing you should do as a start.

I have recently being seeing a pdoc and we are doing some evaluations, so I am going to see how that goes. She seems to think I am fine, as I have a very difficult home life and she thinks some of my behaviour is due to defense mechanisms. Like shutting down emotionaly sometimes, or not showing emotions.

Anyway cant wait to see the results, it is gonna take a bout five weeks in all- And cost a bit too...

Everything is bugging me at the moment, have to go back to work again tomorrow after a month off, cant stand the thought of having to deal with so many people. They are just all gonna make me angry.

thanks for your comments I will let you know how the resuts turn out..

short answer on the books is yes... both because we have built in coping mechanisms and because we are reluctant to change. Also, medicating is tricky because we'll respond poorly to antidepressants which doctors often prescribe to pull someone out of their shell. It can throw us into dangerous mania or psychosis very easily but we're unlikely to open up to a doctor enough for them to see the warning signs. When I was diagnosed I didn't let them verify their sneaking suspicion that I had stpd I just took the antidepressants and ran for it... bad idea... still coming to terms with what I let happen.

Since I got pregnant I've not been on anything, tho I often find myself self medicating with alcohol, pain, melatonin... things I learned from a good friend long ago.... mostly just coffee.... which I need desperately right now. If I didn't have people that cared for me I would need to be hospitalized, the only thing keeping me right is someone to let me know what's right...

We've not lost our minds... as long as someone cares enough to tell us we're being silly we'll cope without treatment... If I were to be left alone the psychosis would take hold and although my little world is an interesting and quite possible one, I'd end up locked up or even dead.

ewingirl wrote:"... mostly just coffee.... which I need desperately right now. If I didn't have people that cared for me I would need to be hospitalized, the only thing keeping me right is someone to let me know what's right...

We've not lost our minds... as long as someone cares enough to tell us we're being silly we'll cope without treatment... If I were to be left alone the psychosis would take hold and although my little world is an interesting and quite possible one, I'd end up locked up or even dead.

I agree with you ewingirl, I agree with you! See look we're making friends already! How about a cup of coffee?